I’m sure at some point someone will land on this blog hoping to find a good deal on Manolo Blahniks. (And it’s ironic that this blog came to be named after shoes, because I couldn’t be any less interested in footwear. I dislike buying shoes, and have four basic pair that last me all year long.) But the mental footwear – those ruby slippers and red shoes – is another story.

The inspiration for this comes from my sister-in-law, who, after reading the blog, came up with a list of her red shoes (which she called her danger zone) and her ruby slippers (life enjoyment). Thank you Dawn!

So in no particular order, here are a couple pairs of red shoes and ruby slippers from my cerebral closet:

Red shoes:

• Self-criticism and judgment: This is the perpetual feeling of never-enoughness. The inner critics, while not as mouthy as they used to be, are still alive and well and ready with a nasty barb anytime I am less than perfect. As my sister-in-law says, this behavior is flat-out destructive. Sometimes the only thing that works is to internally respond to the critics: “I hear you, but I don’t agree with you.”
• Control, control, control: Wanting to control everything and everyone is a fear-based behavior, that stems from my strong need for certainty and safety. But the harder I try to control people and events, the more internal chaos I create. I’ve learned you will never gain control until you lose the need to have it. So I try to LET GO and remind myself that everyone is on their own path. Plus, the last time I checked, I wasn’t General Manager of the Universe.

Ruby slippers:

• Listening to my intuition: This sixth sense, which I feel in my solar plexus area, has never steered me wrong. That doesn’t mean it points me down the easy path – in fact some of the decisions I’ve had to make were gut-wrenchingly difficult – but when I follow my intuition, everything always works out.
• Allow and release: As uncomfortable as our thoughts and emotions can be, they can’t hurt us. So when I feel a wave of anxiety or resentment or other strong emotion, I try to just allow it to be, then release it by imagining I’m blowing dandelion fluff into the wind.

So what’s in your closet?