When people are asked to make a change in their behavior, they often have one of the following reactions:

“I can’t.”

“You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”

“It’s just the way I am.”

“I’m (fill in ethnic group); therefore, I’m (rigid, depressed, crabby, lazy, prone to temper tantrums, etc.)

Are these statements true? If you believe they are, they will be, because our beliefs drive our behavior.

But, behavior repeated over and over is a habit, and habits are not genetic traits. Researchers have yet to find an anger gene or a crabby gene. And like all patterns in our brain, habits can be changed.

Not to say it’s easy. In fact, it can be downright uncomfortable.

If you’ve ever cross country skied on trails before, you know how effortless it is to follow trails that were already made by others who skied that way before. Trying to create your own new trail in 8 inches of snow is much harder. You end up sliding back into the already established grooves.

That is your brain on habits, which are well-traveled connections between neurons that have fired together so often they’re fused. Repeating the habit or pattern is “easy” and comfortable. Changing the pattern — making new neural connections – is unfamiliar and uncomfortable, but is so good for our brain.

So….

-Yes, you can.

-Old dogs can learn new tricks.

-These are only behavior patterns you’ve learned and memorized.

-And no matter what your heritage, there are loving, happy, patient, grateful people who share it with you. Be one of them.

Happy Thanksgiving.